Fiction: Butterball

Written by: James B. Davis

Original Published Here: Link

It's truly terrible. Just imagine it. You open up the freezer to get a Popsicle and tomorrow is Thanksgiving. You've just bought a massive Butterball Turkey for the family to eat. You close the freezer, and suddenly, you hear something from inside of it. You carefully open up the freezer, only to see your new, Butterball Turkey sitting, eating frozen hamburger meat. It leaps down from the freezer and crawls away into the dark living room before you.

You only step one foot into your living room before you slip on the smiley trail left by the Turkey's plucked, half frozen body. As you lay on the ground, you hear the rapid sound of moist legs slapping the floor. It jumps on you and tries to engulf your entire head. Your head is sucked into it's empty, headless body. Every time you pull, it grabs on tighter.

Finally, you stop, and you give in. Your face is pressed against the thawing hamburger meat left in it's stomach and you vomit. Your head is now drowning in a soup of hamburger meat and puke. You now accept your fate, and you pass away from your mortal shell.

Urban Legends: Melon Heads

Artist's representation

Written by: James B. Davis

Melon Heads are a Urban Legend/Cryptid from Ohio, Michigan, and Connecticut. Each state has a somewhat different version of the story but are all the same for the most part.

The most famous of these legends comes from Ohio, and is the most widely excepted. This legend states that the Melon Heads were a group of orphans that were taken into the "care" of a doctor only referred to as Dr. Crow.

Dr. Crow experimented on these children extensively; physically abusing them, giving them electroshock therapy, and injecting their heads with many different chemicals. Their enlarged heads are supposedly the result of these chemicals, and also the reason behind their name "Melon Heads". These experiment also caused them to go insane and become mentally retarded.

After years of abuse and experimentation the Melon Heads supposedly killed the staff, along with Dr. Crow, at the hospital they were kept in and burned it down shortly after.

The only other origin story from these Urban Legends comes from Connecticut. This story states that an asylum for the criminally insane burned down and many of the inmates escaped into the woods. The Melon Heads are then said to be inbred children of the inmates. The inbreeding in turn caused Hydrocephalus; a medical condition that causes extra fluid in the brain, making the head expand.

These Melon Heads are now said to live in the forests of the surrounding areas and either attack people, or are said to be interested in them.

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